Why do we introduce ourselves as a vice president, a traveller, a fashionista, a valedictorian, an amazing cook, the homecoming queen, as someone’s mother, as the owner of a BMW, or as a size 4? How was it decided that what we are is more valuable than who we are? What does it say about us, and what does it do to us, when we don’t value ourselves for just being?
Are we less happy the more closely we identify with a job title, our possessions, our image of ourselves, or our appearance? Are we more likely to forget what we really want out of life, and who we really wanted to be when we grew up? Is it possible that it also makes it impossible to live without these things, if we have bound ourselves too tightly to them in our own minds? Is this why retirement and aging are difficult for many of us?
Why did we go from self acceptance as a child, to other acceptance as an adult? Is it a human survival skill? Do we give up pieces of ourselves each time we strive to meet expectations? When we go for the corporate job, rather than the artsy job we want (or vice versa), do we tell a little piece of ourselves that it isn’t valuable?
Is there a moment in each of our lives that we say that we’re going to let go of other’s approval, and write the improved edition of ourselves? Or do we need to “be” things to complete ourselves?
Just a few questions I’m pondering today.
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