What is elegance, and why do we search for it? In a world that seems intent on labeling everything outdated, and in societies that seek more and more individualism, why are we still fascinated by Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, David Niven and Cary Grant? Why do we seem to crave good manners in a world that thinks them stifling? Why are we able to recognise elegance in others, even if we don’t know exactly why they’re elegant, and even if we aren’t elegant ourselves? Why are we drawn to business people that are ladylike and gentlemanly in a business world that seems willing to stop at nothing to get what it wants?
Could it be that many of the things we complain about are simply a matter of the world losing a bit of its elegance, and we’d like to have it back? When we’re unhappy with the customer service we’ve received, aren’t we missing proper manners in those that we’ve interacted with? When we’ve been pushed to our limits, and we’re seeking to simplify, aren’t we looking for the lost art of elegantly savouring life?
Could it be, that after all is said and done, all we need is a simple life of good manners, good conversation, enjoyable experiences, people to love and lovely surroundings to love them in? Wherever we call home, and whatever we do for a living, wouldn’t we all like to build a life around the elegant things that never go out of style?
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What a lovely post. “Why are we able to recognise elegance in others, even if we don’t know exactly why they’re elegant…” such an interesting contemplation. And I think you answered your own question when you wrote: “all we need is a simple life of good manners, good conversation, enjoyable experiences, people to love and lovely surroundings to love them in.”
Elegance is something that is indeed difficult to define….it doesn’t automatically come with wealth or piety or great personal style. But it does seem to reverberate in the lives of those who are viewed as such. A commonality, however, is undoubtedly this: elegant men and women are polite and kind—not weak—but positively and undamagingly assertive. A smile, a please, and a thank you can often diminish even the most offensive exterior. Ultimately, elegance radiates from within.
Thank you so much for your thoughtful comments! The last paragraph is beautifully worded, and spot on. I couldn’t agree more about elegance radiating from within. Elegance is such a lovely thing when you encounter it, as I just have.
Very best,
D
Thank you, DeeAnne, for such a thought provoking and elegant post.
BTW, have you thought about becoming an “Elegance Coach?” The world could certainly use one.
Rasheed
Thank you Rasheed! That was such a nice thing to say.
My best,
D
A bunch of elegance, precious and rare enough to be appreciated ! Elegance is before all a question of good behaviour
Thanks a lot DeeAnne !
Thank you very much Nat! Your comment means a great deal to me, coming from someone I see as very elegant.
Best wishes,
D
What a beautiful post! I know I treasure elegance where and when I find it. It seems like such a lost art at times, but other times I find it in abundance. It is a trait I try to model as much as possible to people I encounter, and especially to those younger than me.
It’s so true! I often see no sign of elegance, only to have it all around me the next time I look. I always wonder if it’s just a matter of me not taking the time to see the elegance that’s everywhere in the simple things.
What a nice mission you have too!
Best,
D
Great post! We do always go back to the classics!
http://thebudgetsocialite.com/
There just isn’t any replacement for the classics, is there?!
Thank you Trinidad!
D
I love this post! Elegance is absolutely free and makes life softer, prettier, and just plain ole better.
What a lovely point. “Elegance is absolutely free…”
Thank you!
D
I agree.
Back in the day, travel was elegant. Even bus travel. In the fifties, taking a tour by coach meant something. And plane travel in the 60′s — I still remember my mother dressing my sister and I up in matching searsucker Easter suits that she made for us to take our first flight. It was all so exciting.
Even language. Language has lost some of its elegance. Just listening to old movies, they capture a magic that dialog in today’s films does not have. It’s like vocabulary has gotten reduced, people are very busy trying to make their own point without so much as a courteous “is that right?” or”how interesting!”. We really have something to learn from the past in this way, I believe.
I agree so much with you on this. True elegance is borne from sincerity. There is nothing elegant about a put-on. I define kindness as a cross between sincerity and friendliness. And kindness is a key component of elegance.
Lovely post, my friend!
Perfectly put. I really believe that the harried pace of life, and always believing that the new way is the better way, has taken away so much of our elegance.
Thank you for the thought provoking comments Diana!
Following behind the comment of our lovely friend Diana…
Not to mention the elegance of sending a handwritten note on beautiful stationary…ahh…a throwback to my Southern upbringing for sure!
As always…loved your post my friend! XO!