100 Things To Do When the Worst Happens

Valentino.

1. Hold your head up high, it will help you regain your balance

2. Remind yourself that it’s human to make mistakes

3. Apologize sincerely, and without excuses

4. Cry if you feel like it, and then cry some more

5. Call friends/family and ask for support

6. Face the problem

7. Keep your normal routine, even if you feel disconnected or numb

8. Write down your feelings in a journal

9. Ask people you trust for advice

10. Try to avoid making the situation worse

11. Begin dreaming about the future again, as quickly as possible, even if it’s only between bouts of doubt and fear at first

12. Practice yoga

13. Take long walks to think

14. Pray…alot

15. Seek professional help if you feel yourself sinking

16. Educate yourself on what’s happened, and how to cope with it

17. Surround yourself with positive people

18. Adopt a pet for companionship

19. Take long baths

20. Hold on

21. Be careful not to soothe yourself with drugs, alcohol, food, shopping, work or anything else that helps avoid the problem

22. Avoid dating, or beginning a new relationship, until you have your equilibrium back

23. Take a weekend away, even if it’s just to a friend’s house

24. Have a specified period of “worry time” each day, and let things go the rest of the time

25. In other words, don’t obsess

26. Even when you’re hurting, be kind to others

27. Let others help you

28. But don’t let others become a crutch

29. Pick up a new hobby

30. Read a book that will inspire you

31. Remember that you’re not the only one that’s gone through this, and seek support groups

32. Commit to not only surviving, but thriving

33. Help others, as a way of understanding that at any given time we are all facing something difficult

34. Do your best to learn something from the experience

35. Try and find the silver lining to what’s happened to you

36. Cry some more

37. Remember that ups and downs are all a part of life

38. Get plenty of sleep

39. Listen to what your heart is telling you that you need

40. Volunteer to rock infants in your local hospital’s neonatal unit

41. Volunteer to read during the local bookstore’s children’s story hour

42. Don’t forget to see the beauty that’s all around you, despite what’s happened

43. Take on a new challenge, once you’re ready

44. Remind yourself how strong you are, and how many things you’ve overcome in the past

45. Take care of your health

46. Get angry

47. Tell someone you trust that you’re angry

48. Cry some more

49. Be kind to yourself

50. Learn how to cook your favourite meal

51. If you’ve lost your job, consider beginning a new career doing what you’ve always dreamt of doing

52. Ask the older members of your family about the most difficult thing they’ve ever gone through

53. Write “You are strong, you are smart, you are beautiful and you will get through this.” in red lipstick on your bathroom mirror

54. Be prepared to see yourself, and your life, in a new way

55. Slow down, and take care of yourself

56. Remember that endings come right before new beginnings

57. Don’t beat yourself up over what’s happened, or for how long it’s taking you to get over it

58. Remember that every day is a do over

59. Cry some more

60. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again

61. Be proud of yourself for not giving up

62. Truly listen to every piece of advice you’re given, because you never know what might work for you

62. Wake up every day, and just do the best you can to smile

63. If you’re unemployed, improve your marketability by learning a new business skill

64. Consider moving if you can’t start over where you are

65. Face the truth

66. Stop wondering why this happened to you. There may have been no reason.

67. Prepare yourself to make tough decisions

68. Be honest with yourself about what you might need to change in yourself to prevent this from happening again

69. Remember that you will make a new life

70. Listen to mood lifting music

71. Try to avoid feeling sorry for yourself

72. Let yourself grieve

73. Don’t say that it didn’t matter. It did.

74. Don’t withdraw

75. Have a weekly date with friends

76. If you can no longer have what you wanted, think of something new that you want

77. Let others see you struggle and overcome. It may help them to do the same some day.

78. Give up outdated ideas of what your life should look like

79. Accept what is

80. Make a list of all the things you like about yourself

81. Forgive anyone, or any event, that contributed to the problem

82. Do your best to reframe your perspective

83. Realize that you may look back and see this as a positive in some way

84. Read the Tao Te Ching

85. Don’t forget to ask others how they’re doing, or you risk becoming too self-absorbed

86. Let yourself laugh and enjoy life again, without feeling guilty

87. Don’t forget to send thank you notes to those that have been there for you

88. Mark small milestones with a private celebration

89. Take responsibility, accept consequences, but eventually leave the guilt behind

90. Accept that others may not forgive you, and that’s their choice

91. There is no room for regret

92. Make a list of the good things going on in your life, and focus only on them for a day

93. Keep taking care of yourself, even once you begin to feel better

94. Don’t feel guilty for moving on

95. Make a dream book with photos of what your new life will look like

96. Notice when you’ve stopped crying

97. Accept the moments that you regress

98. Throw a dinner party to thank everyone that stood by you

99. Embrace the new life you’re building, and the new people in it

100. When it’s time, have a “letting go ceremony” and look only to the future from that point forward

 

photo- Valentino.

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9 thoughts on “100 Things To Do When the Worst Happens”

  1. Love this. Especially #’s 78 and 84. And what a delightful idea #98 is. I wish I’d had this when going through my divorce. Thankfully, I have it now. Thank you DeeAnne!

  2. I loved “notice when you stop crying”. What a lovely reminder that at some point, you actually will. Really great list even if you are not dealing with the worst and just the blahs. :)

  3. A nice general purpose list that you can draw from in every kind of upheaval. They don’t all fit every worst thing that can happen, but bits and pieces apply to different ones.

  4. Another incredible list. Thank you for taking the time to write it. I’ve kept returning back to it over this past week many, many times. Thank you.

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